On this, the ocassion of my daughter turning two (well, at least, as of a few days ago), I have been giving a lot of thought to my choice to be a career mom.
When I first got pregnant, I didn’t know what I was going to do. I kind of sort of thought I wanted to be a mom, but the timing was awful for all sorts of reasons. And it took me a long time to come to terms with that. I also suffered from a lovely mix of post traumatic stress disorder and post-partum depression. I’m not sure either would have been severe on their own, but together they sure liked to play off each other. I still have nightmares and panic attacks about her birth, and someday on a Flashback Friday, I will be strong enough to share that experience with you all.
But I digress. This is about how I feel as a CareerMom now, and I have to say, it feels pretty good. It can still be very overwhelming (like when she’s refusing to take a nap for the third day in a row and I really need to get back to work), guilt-inducing (on both sides, to be honest) and a little scary, but all in all, I am happy with my choices.
I hope that the rest of you, wherever you are in your journey, can say the same.
I think being more organized has really helped, and I’m eager to start sharing some of the planners I have made with you guys as the next year progresses. Self-care has played an important part too, no doubt. It still occasionally offends my Queen Bee sensibilities when I can’t do it all, but I’m learning to live with it, and each day it does get better. I still want to rail against the box society wants to put me in, but honestly if I wasn’t railing against something, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself, anyway. That’s just who I am.
So here is to forging new paths for myself and my family, and hopefully leaving some trail markers along the way for you, my audience.